Okay,
I need some type time to tell you a little bit about my AM...
Quite jazzed by my adjustments last night and my success with the PJ I was naturally having a tough time going to sleep. I think I finally dozed off before 12...
Earlier in the day, I attempted to curry favor from the wife by brushing our dogs teeth. As dogs get older they tend to get a little "breathy" and it can become annoying if they are sleeping in your face. Dreams of WW1 and fields of mustard gas are often the result of this...
Interestingly enough, they dont use fun flavors like "Berry Burst" or "Mango Chutney Baking Soda Surprise"....
For Dogs, we get "
Poultry flavored" toothpaste.
Naturally the dog didnt like it as much as she would have expected. She squirmed and did her thing and whined a little, but she was good. So then the door opens and my wife comes in. I tell the dog how stellar she is and present her to the wife with fresh poultry breath.
Long story short. Wife is happy, SJ gets to work on the tuning and the dog is acceptable.
So this AM, I am very tired. I tried to get myself to sleep by thinking of fun things to do with the PJ. Naturally this kept me up for a while as I suddenly verged into a twelve person theater made up of barcoloungers and hot chicken wings served by ex playboy bunnies. The mind reels, especially if the barcoloungers are covered in vinyl and I have a gallon or two of olive oil...Later I determine I also need a stone pizza oven and a tap.
Hey, c'mon. Im restless...
Fade to morning...
After a small infusion of java based goodness, I am still sleepy but have turned off the no smoking sign and am moving feely about the house in "Auto" mode. One track is firmly dedicated to the PJ and where I can find enough bunnies to fill my needs...because "Everybody needs a Bunny, Sometime..."
Coffee is done. Its time to brush my teeth.
I wander into the bathroom, listening with one ear to my children asking myself " Is that a good scream or a bad scream?". Absently I prepare and put some paste on my wifes sonicare toothbrush...and go to work.
After slyly slipping past the coffee taste, the toothpaste flavor ninja's my tounge with its deadly strike. My mouth is suddenly assailed by the full sonic driven force of the poultry flavored toothpaste. My mind wakes up as a close association with feathers and dusty chicken coops makes its way into my mind and triggers a
Kernel Fault IRQL not less than or Equal.
Its not Kentucky Fried Chicken, but I have had worse. My Aunt Nancy's cooking comes to mind...
Gagging and laughing at my misfortune at the same time I bend over the sink and start "Phut"ing out the flavor. Pale sienna foam comes out of my mouth and suddenly I am rabid as I add more drool to it in an effort to just get it the hell out. It is not my finest moment, but the sheer idiocy of it just makes me laugh. If this were an english comedy, I wouldnt notice, but of course the audience would.
Cut to SJ finally getting it out of his mouth and rinsing.
Suddenly I realize that I just did this with my wifes toothbrush and she is approaching down the hall with the most chilling phrase I have ever heard. "Hun? Can I have that when you're done?".
Panic begins to ensue as I realize if she finds out she will never use it again and I will be held accountable till the end of time. So I pocketed it and slipped out the hall in the opposite direction and ran upstairs to my toothbrush and switched them, then walked casually down the stairs. She in the meantime has walked around into the living room looking for me. I hand her the toothbrush. "here you go sweetie" I say and walk away.
There is an odd silence as she stands in the hall. "Honey? The brush isnt wet, did you brush your teeth?"
"Oh yes!"
" Oh, ..." then she brightens up.."Oh! You changed my brush for me?"
(Now what man could resist this chance?)
"Mmmmm", I mumur, "Go get ready. We are starting into late time..."
I had packed my lunch the night before. Naturally it was chicken soup...
I ordered out.

The lesson here: Either hide that stuff or dont stay up too late...and never tell your wife things she doesnt need to know...