So the other day I'm walking down the hall in one of the buildings on campus. Classes were in session and as I approached one door I heard the clear, projected and precise diction of one of the professors. I remember well talking like that to a class, but admittedly, was never as good as she. (Plus there was always a voice in the back of my head mumbling, "Gads, you sound fake." )

So just as I pass the door, I hear in this very resonant and formal voice: "If you would like some sugar, come and get it." I nearly busted up right there. Of course, what she said was completely relevant to what was going on, I was just lucky enough to walk by at that moment.

There are times when hearing just the right part of a conversation is golden. Anybody else have some to share?

Please clarify - you want some of my sugar or some more examples of conversational snippets?

You hear these a lot when you work for the oil industry, and it can entertain for hours if you take it out of context.
heres an example: "We need a butt-weld on the male nipple, coming out of the meth injection line."

"You will like my rear entrance" was what i over heard my mother saying to a friend of hers
She was of course refering to the back entrance to through house throught the garden
we still wind her up about that now and it happened years ago

"The more you shake it, the harder it gets..."

The preamble (Which I didn't see/hear) to this was someone who'd put baking soda and vinegar into a 2L pop bottle.

I did not manage to stop from cracking up... Which was immediately followed by several others who caught on to when it was that I walked into the room.

Well, dearest, since I've never had your sugar, it would me hard for me to say whether I wanted more or not.

Marticus, I like yours (I like them all). Reminds me of a joke my older brother used to play on my younger brother about making him a T-shirt that says "Parking in Rear." Since older bro now owns and designs for a t-shirt company, I should immediately remind him of this...

"If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college."

Nice.

"I made my cat bullemic."

"I cant be, I'm allergic to nuts"

Water bottles used at work to clean water based markings written on tables. While horsing around a female got squirted in the face and calls out -
"oooooo.....a face shot!"

Setup story....

Gf sitting on couch, I walk over with this tube of gel candy stuff I got at Blockbuster that night. She asked for a taste of this candy, so I'm standing over her trying to squeeze some of the candy into her mouth so she can try it. There is a knock at my door, and I know it's my friend from upstairs with his gf. I yell "come in". They walk in and with the way the apt is setup, the couch is facing the door, so needless to say I'm over my gf with my back to them, pouring this goo candy into her mouth, then she yells...

"you shot it into the back of my throat!".

My friends eyes get big, he turns around to leave, pushing his following gf back out the door saying "we'll come back later".

Installing a very high speed color scanner feed on a machine.
There is an option for the orientation of the paper feed so I turn to the female lawyer ( who works for EEO) and say rather casually " So..are you an upside down or right side up kinda gal?"

My partner almost peed his pants...